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Chill from Canada.
Pierogis with applesauce.
LeBron can't quit you.

I can't really put my finger on why. But I hate packing. I suppose it is at least partly because I am so unorganized. I know some of it has to do with the fact that I loath change. I hate change the way bomb victims hate the sky, the way Sarah Palin hates the truth, or the way Ken Ham hates science. I just detest the thought of packing to go away. And when I get to where I am going I hate the thought of packing up to go back home. Moving sucks. If it is to a new apartment or to the Bahamas it is a horrible thing to do.

I like having all my stuff with me. I don't know what I am going to need next Friday. How do I pack for that? I don't know what I am going to wear tomorrow let alone next Wednesday. Plus it was 50 degrees today and it is supposed to snow tomorrow. Pack for that? How?

So far we have virtual email, virtual meetings, hell virtual reality. When are we going to have virtual packing? Procrastinators like me need that damn Holodeck from Start trek. That would be amazing. I would pay retail for that. Money is no object compared to not having to estimate the pairs of underwear I should bring to Cleveland. 

Sorry this is short. But I have to pack.

Again? Really? Going down my newsfeed between memes and updated profile pictures I see yet another zealot. This time he is blaming the gays for the mega-drought in California. First of all which is it? The gays just got blamed for a hurricane. Or do the friends of Dorothy have the superpowers to do both? You can Google the guy if you want. But I am not using his name or helping him to get hits here.

Also please allow me clear something up. If something catastrophic happens on California, the gays didn't do it. It's Mecca. It's the Holy Land. If we wanted to do some damage we would unleash the velvet mafia in Alabama and rain on every father/cousin wedding from now until the end of time. We are going to every NASCAR race, every Republican National Convention and stopping off to make out on Ted Cruz's lawn before we head on down to the Westboro Baptist church. Get it? A quick aside on Ted Cruz: If John McCain calls you a "Wacko Bird" that's the time to commit yourself buddy, not run for president. It's like Ike Turner telling you that you are too violent.

So thanks crazy zealot for telling the world about our super powers. You are like the 
Charles Xavier for the gay X-Men. (Sorry the LGBTQITSLFA-Men...Women...Womyn?) Whatever. At any rate, let's start a movement. Calling all gays. Get to the nearest event ending in N' as opposed to ING and rain down some Bob Fosse, rainbow, Amageddon with some lovely appetizers to follow. Or maybe a nice softball game would be better. What do you think 'Merica?

You can only help people when they are ready. Poker is a game of deception. But in this case, I told the man next to me I had two pair and he still called with one. Was he getting the right odds to call? No. Was he practically drawing dead? Yes. Remember Matthew 6:26? "Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?" Well I'm a much better poker player. But I don't always get to be the winner. Even when I try to help a guy out. I'm so upset I am actually going biblical!

This has happened a thousand times to me at the table. It could potentially happen another thousand times too. But I keep the faith. I keep the faith that the true odds of a situation will actually come to fruition and common sense will prevail. 

But the thing I am thinking about is how you can't help people until they are ready. He wanted to draw with a pair against all odds. And that is what he did. We have all done it. We have all tried to help someone who didn't want to listen. We have all begged our buddies not to get involved with someone who is bad news by all accounts. But they do it anyway. We have all seen the writing on the wall and just bombed at getting the message across to the ones we love. It sucks.

All you can do is put on your damage control hat and know the birdbrains of the world are going to find a way to get fed.