Phone: 609-287-6559

Email: michelletomko@hotmail.com

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Red & Green

Oh my god! What a horrible day. I got up with a bit of brain fog, made some coffee, and made my St. Paddy's Day plans. Oh yes. It is Paddy not Patty. As we all learned on the Marc Berman Show on WOND 1400 this past Saturdayhttp://paddynotpatty.com/. What happens next has plagued women since the beginning of time. I got the dreaded period migraine. Or what I like to call PROOF THAT GOD IS A MAN.

What kind of system is this maker of the universe? Not only do women have to squeeze out puppies a few times in their life. But they also need to bleed from their private parts for forty freaking years too. Couldn't you have put some kind of switch up there or something? 

Let's imagine men having to bleed from their penises once a month shall we. Yeah right. Have you seen one of them get a paper cut? The world would come to a screeching halt, emergency rooms would be filled and the Catholic Church would make it a sacrament.

Oh well. I'm not Irish anyway. Plus there is always next year. Here in Atlantic City there is even tomorrow. Our world famous Irish Pub has a giant celebration tomorrow called BAG DAY. Google it. I'll be there transmitting fun with THE MARC BERMAN SHOW at 1:00p.m. And I had half the experience of the holiday today anyway. I did throw up. Plus look at all the money I saved on beer. 

Blog Author

Michelle Tomko's comedy is a fervent blend of tomboy sensibilities courtesy of the older brothers she grew up with in the Midwest and the barrage of perimenopausal chaos the East Coast world has heaped upon her. She pulls her humor from everyday observations and classic stories of family, travel, pets, and adversity. With razor-sharp crowd work and improvisational skills to the rock-solid timing of a veteran performer, Michelle’s act is not to be missed!

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