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I had older bother's growing up. I remember them asking if I wanted to play 52 Pick Up. When I said yes, they scattered a deck of cards around the room and told me it was my turn and I had to pick them up. This was my first lesson in how cruel a game of cards can be. I have had probably thousands of painful lessons since then. No I didn't fall for 52 Pick Up again. But I do play poker. 

If you know a poker player, unless they are what we call in the industry "Crazy Asian Luckbox", then you have heard umpteen of these bad beat stories. I have lost with full houses. I have lost with aces (most recently to a drunk at Borgata in cut-off shorts who was dealt 10-2 off-suit. My favorite of these stories is once when a Crazy Asian Luckbox could only beat me if the last card was the King of Diamonds. It came out. But that is not the worst of it. The dealer exposed this card before all players had the chance to bet. By rule the card had to be taken off the board and reshuffled in the deck. You guessed it. After shuffling the card came out again! A 46-1 proposition. He did it twice! Miraculous! That is flipping a coin 50 times and it being heads 46 out of 50. TWICE! So much for twelve years of Catholic School. Apparently, the Buddha is correct.

So why do I keep going back for more? Because like Ann Frank so many years ago when she said "Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart." I still believe that the odds will even out and I will be rewarded for playing tight, not being greedy, being a student of the game, staying relatively sober when I play and yes, being really good at heart. But until then, as with the rest of my unconventional life, I am going to wait for aces, wince and push all in!

A note on the slightly racist term Crazy Asain Luckbox. Don't worry. They know! In fact one CAL in Atlantic City goes by the name Crazy Asian. I don't even know his real name if I wanted to use it! Namasté.